UFO Thought Of The Day: Kind Of Like A Frog

UFO Thought Of The Day:

 "It was kind of like a frog...except it was big and fast."

The Sound Of French Fries: Christmas Edition 6

 

Attention foodies:

Christmas-themed fast food haiku!

The sixth edition.

Merry Crushmas

Ho-ho-oh, no! What happened to this elf? I guess he was flattened by the Mannheim Steamroller. Merry Crushmas!

 

When A Lima Bean Becomes Sentient

When A Lima Bean Becomes Sentient

Every so often, a lima bean becomes sentient—proclaiming itself to have become a "lima being." Having gazed upon its own reflection, it is now set apart from its lima brethren—destined to ponder its place in the universe. Most experts blame GMOs for the emergence of this phenomena, but no definitive cause has yet bean identified.

The Math Tooter

The Math Tooter

In 2016, toy company Gasbro released a flatulence-focused educational aid called The Math Tooter. The aim was to sell a product that appealed to kids' fascination with toilet humor, while at the same time teaching them basic math skills. It was a small, jolly fat man dressed in graduation attire; when you squeezed him he would vocalize math problems, then end with various puns and fart noises.

While The Math Tooter was a hit with children, sales quickly tanked due to parents being turned off by the loud fart noises and lingering stench. Gasbro CEO Lenard Ripsworth had this to say about the toy: "We all thought The Math Tooter was hilarious, but somehow our designers had baked in the stench of farts into its rubber skin too well; it was stinking up people's houses something fierce. I guess the word eventually got out."

The following year, competing toy company Flattel released their answer to the The Math Tooter, The Farty Smarty.  It had internet connectivity and taught children simple programming, but sales were similarly lackluster. These days, both toys go for high prices on Ebay...but potential buyers should be advised about the odor.

The Sound Of French Fries: Halloween Edition 4

It's been a while, so

here's more fast food haiku

with a Halloween twist!

Derpetology

Derpetology: [dur-pi-tol-uh-gee] noun. 1. The branch of zoology concerned with mentally disabled reptiles and amphibians.