Sunday, June 14, 2026

A Fry In My Onion Rings


A Fry In My Onion Rings

A fry in my onion rings!
Oh, what happiness it brings--
one of those potato strings.
It's a treat that's fit for kings!

Surely it is a treasure
conjured here for my pleasure
via some cosmic measure,
and it couldn't be fresher!

Tell me, who could ever frown
on this yummy, golden brown
maverick from tasty town?
I can't wait to chomp it down!
 

Saturday, June 6, 2026

The Real Four Alien Species Revealed


By now you've heard about the four alien species that have been disclosed in the UFO files. You know, the usual suspects: Greys, Nordics, Reptilians, and Insectoids. What if I told you it was all false? That's right, here are the REAL four alien species that are here on Earth--the ones the governments of the world don't want you to know about!

Ptoobuhr: One-eyed, red weirdos with a single arm on top of their heads. Turns out you don't need opposable thumbs to be a technologically advanced race--one will do just fine. They steal resources from Earth secretly for their own agendas. Brings new meaning to the term "one-armed bandit."

Dreedledorn: Serpentine freaks that communicate via light patterns they flash from their multiple eyes. They're explorers from Forgahgos, an alternate dimension on Mars. Their females are small, yellow, and have the ability to fly. Weird.

Zeaxog: Tiny mischief-makers with big curly ears, likely responsible for goblin and gnome sightings. They enjoy playing cruel pranks and cutting up livestock, the little sickos. They wear tall hats which represent their rank in society.

Mtekarek: Ever have one of those annoying neighbors that won't leave you alone? That's what these guys are. They're tall, jellyfish-like, and fly. They're very friendly and are happy to share their technological advancements, at least.

Tuesday, May 26, 2026

An Onion Ring In My Fries (A Fast Food Poem)

 


Ever get an onion ring in your fries? Sure, you could've just ordered onion rings, but finding one in your fries is a lucky bonus.

Wednesday, May 20, 2026

A Pair Of Pears


Here we have a pair of pears. Let's compear them: One looks pearturbed while the other is pearfectly happy.
 

Wednesday, May 6, 2026

They Were Always The BerenSTAIN Bears


This should settle the argument once and for all. The Mandela Effect is irrelevant...they were always The BerenSTAIN Bears.

Monday, April 27, 2026

Men In Black Up Close


Ever wondered what those Men In Black/Shadow People look like up close? Well, here you go.

Saturday, April 18, 2026