Sunday, December 31, 2017

Merry Fishmas & Happy New Ear


Look what the yule tide washed in! Merry Fishmas & Happy New Ear to you and your creatures.

Sunday, December 24, 2017

The Sound Of French Fries - 2nd Christmas Edition


Get ready for more
greasy fast food haiku with
a holiday twist!

The second edition of Christmas-themed fast food haiku! Deck the halls with grease and chill out with these wacky zen poems.

Friday, December 8, 2017

Holiday Horror Cinema


This week's feature presentations at Holiday Horror Cinema:

Poultrygeist 2: The Turkeying

Something in this house has gone afowl! Thanksgiving seemed the perfect time for Chuck Cluckington and his family to break in their new rural home, but there's more to the property than meets the eye. After encountering flying utensils and disembodied bird noises, the family discovers their humble abode was built upon the remnants of a turkey farm–where thousands of turkeys were slaughtered for Thanksgiving! The feathered phantoms have converged into one malevolent entity–a poultrygeist! Can the family find a way to put the avian entity to rest?

It Came From The Cranberry Swamp

From the critically acclaimed director of "Vampire Elves" and "The Mayhem Steamroller" comes a new foray into holiday horror! When a shipment of cranberry sauce gets derailed into a swamp, it fuses with the fetid waters and becomes a sentient, gelatinous creature. As it slides through the city swallowing everything in its path, authorities struggle to subdue the mass. One scientist may hold the key as he studies the leftover cranberry sauce from a previous shipment by the same company that caused the spill...

Deviled Eggs

While on a mission to a distant planet, hungry explorers discover a cache of mysterious eggs and fry them up out of desperation; they savor the unique taste and decide to share them with Earth. However, a volatile proton storm strikes on the way back home and the crew finds it has an electrifying effect on the odd ovums: they begin hatching into devilish, toothed horrors–ravenous for flesh! A brutal game of hide-and-seek begins as the crew are devoured one by one. WARNING: The end may not be what you'd eggspect! One thing's for sure, this won't be going over easy!

Friday, November 24, 2017

Black Friday Haiku


Thanksgiving? What's that?
Who needs turkey when you can
shop 'til your feet bleed?

Here's a few haiku to ponder over as you plow through the stinking hordes on Black Friday. May the sales be ever in your favor.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Friday, November 10, 2017

Rhymania: Observation In Alien Head Rotation


No need for elation...
this is just an observation,
a simple inspiration:
alien head rotation!

Spinning heads in space:
each with a warping face–
a different humanoid race.
Now are you keeping pace?

Don't let it hurt your head...
it'll bug you 'til you're dead
if you think into what I've said–
or study the words you read.

YOUR BRAIN IS MADE OF BREAD!