Halloween Pumpkin Fries

Happy Halloween! Have some pumpkin fries.

Dopplerganger

Philosoraptor strikes again!

COVID-19 Haiku 3

        

COVID-19 Haiku 3

COVID's still out there

so wear a mask, dumbasses

it's not that damn hard

worldwide pandemic

how did we let this happen?

complacency kills

2020 needs

more Corona beer and less

coronavirus

wear a damn face mask

quit crying about your rights

it's for public health

don't go out to bars

COVID-19 breeding ground

go slut somewhere else

let's burn the world down

fire sanitizes all things

can't let COVID win

quarantine sucks, but

my stimulus check came in

hello, new iMac

French Freyes

French Freyes! Try 'em with See Salt!

Pizzapocalypse

Just like your barbecue pizza, the entire world will be smoked!

Fast Food Haiku Break!

Fast Food Haiku Break!

lunch at KFC

acid reflux imminent

need more Pepsi, stat!

the wise often say

it's what we love that kills us

for me it's fast food

Culver's parking lot

tire scrape marks paint the curb black
narrow drive-thru woes

Door-Dash made a goof

someone's Arby's on my porch
oh well, free dinner

Varsity french fries
soggy, limp and flavorless
no sauce can save them

tough and overcooked
dude...what happened, McDonalds?
your chicken sucks now

these fries taste like fish

I almost threw up, for real
change your grease, Wendy's

Super Mario Oddity

Wow, SNES cartridges were so much bigger than today's Switch games. Times have certainly changed.

#april fools

COVID-19 Haiku 2

COVID-19 Haiku 2

few cars on commute

COVID-19 scared them off

goodbye smog, at least

gun sales skyrocket

but firearms cannot kill the

coronavirus

super flu or not

wash hands after Walmart trip

hygiene 101

Wendy's dining room

closed due to COVID-19

drive-thru if you dare

Mr. Clean fights germs

he is no scrub at scrubbing

meet your doom, flu bugs

quarantine day 12

still sane as long as I have

Netflix and popcorn

oh, Clorox bleach wipes

you burn my hands, but that's fine

die, COVID-19

COVID-19 Haiku

COVID-19 Haiku

COVID-19 scare

public gatherings cancelled

wash your hands, jerkwads

schools closed, job layoffs

the world brought to a halt by

one little virus

widespread quarantine

even Waffle House is closed

end of world confirmed

scrub every surface

kill that coronavirus

Lysol is your friend

pandemic panic

toilet paper all sold out

humans are stupid

pollen levels high

COVID-19 spreading too

give our lungs a break

plague containment fail

filthy Wuhan meat market

thanks a lot, China

Rhymania: The Zork Of York

The Zork Of York is a dork who rides a stork to work and eats barbecue pork without a fork.

Valentine's Day Haiku 4

If you like haiku,

here's more valentine's-themed ones.

The 4th edition.

FROGLAPSE!

Froglapse: /frog-laps/ Noun

1. Mysterious recurrence of frogs/toads in one's apartment or domicile.

Example: "I found another frog in the house...that's the fifth one this week! It's been a toadal froglapse!"

2. The act of reverting to a frog-like state either by evolutionary, magical, or other transformative means...as in a were-frog.