Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Something Smells Fishy (Fish Haiku)

Do you smell something fishy? Oh right, it's fish haiku! Relax with these zen poems from the deep.

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Don't Step On That Slug (Slug Haiku)

Check out this video for some slugarific haiku. Most of these are from my new book, Haiku For Slugs. If you like what you see, subscribe to my YouTube channel. More to come!

Sunday, May 15, 2016

Ham:cube - Gutting Room Floor

That's right, the boys are back! Hot on the rump of their debut albumen, Nice To Meat You, comes a very special EP chop full of remixes and oddities from the last recording session. Just as a slaughterhouse would grind up pig noses for cat food, [ham:cube] has compiled their leftovers into a Frankenstein elecktro masterpiece! As a lavish digi-pack, it'll only be available in 666 units as physical copy...and then as digital downloaden exclusively on the internet fanshop!

Full Track Listing:

01. Oink Oink, Motherfuckers!
02. Turkey Bacon Makes The Rage In Me Rise
03. Leftover Hotdogs feat. Byproduct Brigade
04. Fappy Meal (The McDonald's Drive-Thru Girl Was Hot)
05. Ketchup Bottle Farts (Instrumental)
06. Sausage Neck (Back From Boot Camp mix by Funky Vote)
07. Porkin' Mindy (Sloppy Seconds mix by Chubby Chas-R)
08. Rotisserie Piglets
09. The Little Hairs On It (Toothpick mix by Dakota Feedbag)
10. Attempted Hamicide (Demo 2014)
11. I Gave Your Mommy My Pastrami
12. Ingredients Of Spam (Never List 'Em All mix by KFMDN)

----- Attention [ham:cube] fans and all goth weirdos -----

Necropolis Records presents: A Night Of Evil at The Torture Rack on July 16, 2016 from 7:00 PM until 3:00 AM. All ages permitted as long as you have a good fake ID.

With live elektro music by: [ham:cube], Dakota Feedbag, Funky Vote, A Popped Zit Gone Berzerk, and DMV Nation. There'll also be a performance by Groochie, the S&M M&M (don't ask). Prepare your soul for a night of fire breathing, tattooed cyber sluts, people dressed like Batman or something, confused furries with glowing paws, plastic wrap butt-whipping and other goth nonsense.

Friday, May 13, 2016

The Sound Of French Fries: Fast Food Haiku

It's fast food haiku,
this time in video form.
Like, share, and subscribe!

This is the first in a series of YouTube videos I'm doing to promote my book, Haiku For Slugs. Stay tuned for more.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Cinco De Mayo: 5 x The Grossness

Here's your obligatory Cinco De Mayo post. I have no idea why anyone would want 5 mayos, but here you go. Seriously, mayo is disgusting.