The Sound Of French Fries: Christmas Edition 4

It's almost Christmas.

More fast food haiku inbound!

Get it while it's hot!

This is the 4th video in my The Sound Of French Fries: Christmas Edition series. Now go to bed, Kris Crinkle Fries will arrive soon with his sack full of Arby's coupons.

Toy Yoda In My Toyota #4: Holiday Edition

--- Toy Yoda In My Toyota: Holiday Edition ---

A Merry Christmas, we hope you will have!

Black Friday Haiku 3

Turkey day is here...

that means time for more haiku

and retail chaos!

Drift into a tryptophan coma with these zen poems focusing on the holiday madness to come.

Emoclairs

Is your soul a dark pit of sorrow and remorse? Then like, you should totally try an Emoclair donut. They won't cure your crushing existential crisis, but hey...whatevs. So don't be a poser and drag your brooding butt over to Hot Topic to try some Emoclairs today. Or don't...not like I care. Eclairs go fast, so like...you probably won't be able to get 'em anyways. 😔

Totally available in these flavors:

Dark Chocolate Despair

Bleak Outlook Blueberry

Lemon Lament

All Is Lost Strawberry Frost

Peppermint Prozac

Life Is Pain Plantain

No Hope Cantaloupe

Raspberry Remorse

The Sound Of French Fries: Halloween Edition 2

Spookified fast food...

that's what this vid is about.

Why not have a watch?

New Bigfoot Stickers/ Magnets

I added some new Bigfoot-themed bumper stickers / magnets to my CafePress site. Check 'em out at the usual place: http://www.cafepress.com/goblinsden.

DomiNose Pizza: The Video Experience

Is the pizzapocalypse upon us? Nobody nose.

I Can't Dew This Anymore

DeW nOt pAsS gO. 2 maNy flAvoRz!

DomiNose Pizza

hEllo, dOmiNose? Do U deLiver 2 aLterNaTe diMeNsiOnS?

Plancakes

Plancakes

I love me some pancakes

and of course waffles, too.

I eat them every day...

how about you?

Pancakes for breakfast,

pancakes for lunch.

Pancakes for dinner,

and don't forget brunch!

Every chance I get,

I pour on a fresh batch.

I drown 'em in syrup

and gulp 'em down the hatch!

Sometimes I have bacon

scorched up nice and black.

Gotta have a crispy side

to go with my short stack!

No other foods will do...

I don't see their appeal.

That's why I plan for pancakes

each and every meal!

The Goblin's Den at CafePress: Summer Update

Don't forget, I have a CafePress shop with bumper stickers, magnets, shot glasses, and more. Check 'em out at https://www.cafepress.com/goblinsden. Beach stickers/magnets are discounted for the summer season!

Virtual Lima Beans

Something screamed in my mind's eye, "Virtual Lima Beans!" And then it was over, I knew the world was doomed.

Alien Haiku 4

When E.T.s arrive,

I hope they see these haiku

and have a few yuks.

The 4th video in my alien haiku series, hope you enjoy.

Toy Yoda In My Toyota #3

Hey look, it's another Toy Yoda in my Toyota. Ha!

Feaster Bunny

The Feaster Bunny (aka Peter Rottontail) says, "Spring rains bring fresh BRAINS!!!"

Tornadough Warning!

Q: What do you call a tornado that hits a bakery?

A: a tornadough.

If it hits a corn field, it'a cornado. If it hits a brothel, it's a whorenado. If it hits a pack of wild boars, it's a boarnado. If it hits a mexican restaurant, it's a tortillanado. How about a tile depot? That's a floornado. Or a tomato farm? That's a tormato.

Maybe there could be a tornado-themed cereal called Tornad-O's; it would have tornado, raindrop, and lightning-shaped grain pieces with flying cow marshmallows (the O's would be black CherriO pieces to resemble tires). All the flavors of the great plains in one place!

Bad Puns 101: Currier Service

Q: How do Indian restaurants get their food shipments?

A: A currier service.

Instead of a courier service...get it? Har-har.

It's Pizza...SMOKED!

Ever had a SMOKED pizza?

Valentine's Day Haiku 3

It's Valentine's Day,

and you know what that means, right?

More haiku, of course!

Welcome to another edition of Valentine's Day haiku. I got started kind of late on this one...but it's still technically February 14th, so here it is!

Muppet Scalps

This just in: Muppet scalps are excellent car wash sponges.

Beach Bumper Stickers

New bumper stickers/magnets are available at my CafePress store. Check out these beach-inspired designs and more at www.cafepress.com/goblinsden.

I'll be revamping the store soon, so pardon the mess while I get things sorted out. Note that some products (such as ceramic pet bowls) aren't carried by CafePress anymore and will no longer be available.